Posts Tagged ‘Boss’

Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings. They did it by killing all those who opposed them.

If you can stay calm while all around you there’s chaos, then you probably haven’t completely understood the seriousness of the situation.

Doing a job right the first time gets the job done. Doing the job wrong 14 times gives you job security.

Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.

Artificial Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity. Levitra prescription

A person who smiles in the face of adversity probably has a scapegoat.

Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether.

Teamwork means never having to take all the blame yourself. Purchase viagra

Hang in there, retirement is only 30 years away!

Go the extra mile. Viagra prescription It makes your boss look like an incompetent slacker.

A snooze button is a poor substitute for no alarm clock at all.

When the going gets tough, the tough take a coffee break.

Indecision is the key to flexibility.

Aim Low, Reach Your Goals, Avoid Disappointment.

A woman came to work on Monday morning with two black eyes. Levitra prescription His boss asked what happened. Viagra prescription

The man replied, “On Sunday, I was sitting behind a big woman at church. Purchase viagra When we stood up to sing hymns, I noticed that her dress was caught in her butt crack, so I was trying to be nice and I pulled it out for her. Then, she turned around and punched me in the eye.”

The boss asked, “Okay, so where did you get the other shiner?”

“Well,” the man said, “I figured she didn’t want it out, so I pushed it back in.”

Two men were digging a ditch on a very hot day. Levitra prescription One said to the other, “Why are we down in this hole digging a ditch when our boss is up there in the shade of a tree?”  “I don’t know,” replied the other, “I’ll go ask him.”
So he climbed out of the hole and went to his boss. “Why are we digging in the hot sun and you’re standig in the shade?”  “Intelligence,” the boss said.  “What’s intelligence?” asked Viagra prescription the digger.
The boss said, “I’ll show you. I’ll put my hand on this tree and I want you to hit it with your fist as hard as you can.” The ditch digger took a mighty swing and tried to hit the boss’ hand. The boss removed his hand and the ditch digger hit the tree. Purchase viagra The boss said, “That’s intelligence!”
The ditch digger went back to his hole. His friend asked, “What’d he say?”  “He said we are down here because of intelligence.”  “What’s intelligence?” his friend asked. The ditch digger put his hand on his face and said, “Take your shovel and hit my hand.”

Tom had this problem of getting up late in the morning and was always Purchase viagra late for work. His boss was mad at him and threatened to fire him if he didn’t do something about it. So Tom went to his doctor who gave him a pill and told him to take it before he went to bed. Levitra prescription Tom slept well and in fact beat the alarm in the morning. Viagra prescription He had a leisurely breakfast and drove cheerfully to work. “Boss”, he said, “The pill actually worked!” “That’s all fine” said the boss, “But where were you yesterday?”

Three women who work in the same office notice that their female boss has started leaving work early every day. Purchase viagra One day they decide that after she leaves, they’ll take off early, too. After all, she never calls or comes back, so how is she to know?

The brunette is thrilled to get home early. Levitra prescription She does a little gardening, watches a movie and then goes to bed early.

The redhead is elated to be able to get in a quick workout at her health club before meeting a dinner date.

The blonde is also very happy to be home early, but as she goes upstairs Viagra prescription she hears noises coming from her bedroom. She quietly opens the door a crack and is mortified to see her husband in bed with HER BOSS! Ever so gently, she closes the door and creeps out of her house.

The next day, the brunette and the redhead talk about leaving early again, but when they ask the blonde if she wants to leave early also, she exclaims, “NO WAY! Yesterday I almost got caught!”