The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
“Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, ‘There’s Jennifer, she’s a lawyer,’ or ‘that’s Michael. He’s a doctor.’”
A small voice at [...]

An old man visits his doctor and after thorough examination the doctor tells him: “I have good news and bad news, what would you like to hear first?”
Patient: “Well, give me the bad news first.”
Doctor: “You have cancer, I estimate that you have about two years left.”
Patient: “Oh no! That’s awefull! In two years my [...]

The student – not necessarily a well-prepared student – sat in his life science classroom staring at a question on the final exam paper.
The question directed:
“Give four advantages of breast milk.”
What to write? He sighed, and began to scribble
whatever came into his head, hoping for the best:
1. No need to boil.
2. Cats can’t steal it.
3. [...]

In the spirit of giving, we’re gonna give you some more Obama Jokes… a flurry of Q&A shorties sure to leave you asking for more. Everyone will be laughing… except for Barack Obama, because that would be racist.
Q. What do Obama and Osama have in common?
A. They both have friends who bombed the Pentagon.
Q. Why did [...]

Barack Obama was seated next to a little girl on an airplane trip back to Washington. He turned to her and said, “Let’s talk. I’ve heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.”
The little girl, who had just opened her book, closed it slowly and said to The [...]

A 70-year-old man goes to the doctor’s for a physical.
The doctor runs some tests and says to the man, “Well, everything seems to be in top condition physically, but what about mentally? How is your connection with God?”
And the man says, “Oh me and God? We’re tight. We have a real bond, he’s good to [...]

A woman says to her husband that she wants to have plastic surgery to enlarge her breasts.
Her husband tells her, “Hey, you don’t need surgery to do that. I know how to do it without surgery.”
She asks, “How do I do it without surgery?”
Her husband answers, “Just rub toilet paper between them.”
“How does that make [...]

A married couple went to he hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that would transfer a portion of the mother’s labour pain to the father. He asked if they were willing to try it out.
They were both very much in favour of it.
The [...]

Do you know what the pope and a christmas tree have in common?there balls are for decoration only

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Jon bought two horses, and could never remember which was which. A neighbor suggested that he cut the tail of one horse and that worked great until the other horse got his tail caught in a bush. It tore just right and looked exactly like the other horse’s tail and our friend was stuck again.The [...]

1. It’s easier for a woman to “turn on” a computer
2. Women don’t have motherboard fixations.
3. Women are much better at FDISK-ing a hard drive
4. When lost on the Internet, women are willing to ask for directions.
5. Women can communicate gossip and rumors quicker than the fastest modem.
6. Only women (I think) can marry Bill [...]

There are two farmers in a small village.They have been togeather since childhood.They say they
are very close friends.They are both married but only one of them has children.The other one is suffering very much from having none.So the other day the poor one comes to his friend and asks him to have a serious talk.He [...]